Dear Chastity,

This would be a lot easier to manage if I wasn't so touchy-feely.

Not that I was planning to do anything sexual...he and I have never been that way.

But cuddling in bed? Somehow, I don't think you'd approve.

But Chastity--he's like my gay boyfriend! We used to sleep next to each other like little kids--nothing romantic or anything--ever.

Just something I'd do with him...and other guys AND girls.

& now he doesn't understand--can't understand why I won't come over and snuggle while watching TV.

Oh and Chastity?

My mom went away for [only] 5 days and found me a potential future husband.
[saw his facebook. my status = not interested]

I want this year for us, Chastity.

& most interestingly, the truth of the matter (for right now, at least) is that I don't even want to cuddle in bed with him.

I don't want to cuddle in bed with any man.
I don't want any type of physicality beyond hugging (and maybe holding hands platonically) with any man.

It's surprising.

[it's a relief]

Thanks for showing me...for reminding me about balance and purity and security, Chastity.